Metallica

I know its a few days overdue, but what with work and a lovely public holiday since the weekend, I just haven’t been able to find the time to post. Anyways…here are some thoughts on Saturday’s Coca Colab Massive Mix at Supersport Park in Centurion:

Assholes crap cocksucking fucking useless crackwhore bullshit toilet douche.

That’s pretty much what I think of the organisation that went into the 13 hour music festival attended by approximately 43 000 people. And I am most certainly not the only person to share the aforesaid sentiments. There are many others like me.

Has anyone ever actually stood around at a concert for ten hours or so without so much as a drop of alcohol? Its fucking soul-destroying, let me tell you. I wasn’t prepared to wait for 2 hours in a queue of filthy plebians just to sort myself a few beers and the queues at the Coke and food stands were, at times, just as painful. In fact, I understand that supplies of Coke sold out at some stage during the afternoon, which is a fantastic thumb up the arse to Coca Cola, who sponsored the whole fucking thing.

Worse still, it seems no-one has yet stepped up to take the wrap for cocking up what could otherwise have been an awesome event. Promoters Big Concerts have apologised, although they have also made it very clear that they do not believe the monumental avalanche of shit to be their fault. They’re shifting the blame onto Supersport Park and its vendors.

To Big Concerts, I say: you guys are the promoters – you make sure that everything runs smoothly; you knew that 43 000 people had bought tickets, and at R400 for a general admission ticket, you had a fucking duty to make very sure that everything was sorted nicely, so its your cocks on the chopping block this time, buddies. Coca Cola, 5Fm and everyone else who sponsored the debacle should also drop trou and buk for a licking or two (with a stick, I mean): sponsors should take responsibility for a stuff up, ‘cos there’s no doubt that they’d all be very happy to skip to the head of the blow-job line with big grins on their faces had the concert gone down well.

Having so bitched, I must add that the acts were pretty good: the South African bands, Simple Plan, the Rasmus, Seether, Collective Soul – awesome. Solid rock. We rocked hard. Metallica, terrifying…but oh so good. And kudos to them for sticking to the older, harder, thrashier stuff.

Just a pity the sound clipped a few times. More unnecessary, amateur fuck-ups. And once again, a serious pity that most of us were sober for the whole fucking concert and couldn’t get as crazy as we had hoped. For what its worth, the Massive Mix proved conclusively that it is not possible to have fun without liquor. So now you know.

Oh yes. Fatboy Slim was incredible. Just another fucking pity that his set clashed with Metallica’s. Cock up number godknowshowmuch.