Well, the past few days have been rather interesting from both an international and a local perspective, assuming you find high profile criminal trials interesting. I’ll assume you do, because I like to think that morons don’t read Splattermail.

Firstly, Saddam Hussein has been found guilty of crimes against humanity and has been sentenced to death by hanging. When I heard the news early on Sunday morning, I was initially disgusted, assuming instantly that the verdict had been handed down by a Western tribunal. I was moderately relieved when I learned that an Iraqi court and judges were responsible. You can take this as an admission of ignorance on my part – I plan on nailing my balls to a 2 by 4 this evening as penance.

I’m not too sure how stoked I am on the whole death penalty vibe. Life imprisonment – great. Personally, I just feel that a far more powerful message could have been delivered to the world by letting him live. You know, show a bit of compassion, turn the other cheek and all (and no, I’m NOT talking about “Anal Annihilation 5: Turn the Other Cheek”). Tony Blez has already voiced his disapproval at the sentence, although I hear that George and Condoleezza dressed up as Balki and Cousin Larry and did the Mepos “Dance of Joy” when they received the news. Assholes.

It’ll probably still be quite a while before Saddam gets the noose, but while he starts moving appeal proceedings forward (which he will undoubtedly do), let’s all just consider this: should Bush and Blair not be hauled before a war crimes hearing of some sort or another, particularly given that between them they have been responsible for considerably more Iraqi deaths than Hussein ever was? At the very least, in the spirit of transparency and accountability, both the US and UK governments should submit themselves to an independent commission of inquiry: after all, what do they have to lose?

Well, the Tonester has already rejected a call for such an inquiry. What have you got to hide, you poncy rascal!?

Moving closer to home, Schabir Shaik’s appeal against his fraud and corruption convictions have been hoofed from the Supreme Court of Appeal in a lovely little ruling delivered earlier today by Judge Hilary (girl’s name) Squires, which also upheld the trial court’s finding that the relationship between Jake “the Snake” Zuma and Shaik had been “generally corrupt”.

According to IOL, “(e)xperts have agreed that the outcome of Shaik’s appeal would have a direct bearing on a decision by the state on whether to re-open a corruption case against Zuma“.

Smashing! Super stoked that the Zuma vibe still stands a shot of progressing! Of course, I’m not going to pin my hopes and dreams on the National Prosecuting Authority just yet: they’re generally not the ballsiest bunch. Frankly, if I were the NPA, I would have struck up a deal with Shaik ages ago in exchange for his testimony against Zuma. We have bigger fish to fry than Schabby, people: we have a big, bug-eyed barbel to batter and dunk in hot oil.

There. Hope that you feel enriched and wiser for having read my thoughts, terse as they may be. There will still be plench developments in the months to come, so I’m going to reserve further comment until we hear more. Now, in the spirit of truth, justice and a brighter, more democratic future for all, let’s all take a moment to enjoy this glorious visual representation of peace, love and understanding.