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Entries from May 2008

“Linkbaiting” (or a brief lesson on how retarded the internet can be)

May 29th, 2008 · 2 Comments

A few days ago I posted a story about a thirteen-year-old who maxed out his dad’s credit card on hookers, XBox and Oreos. Quite understandably, there was concern that the story wasn’t entirely accurate. Those concerns were well founded.
Warning: the following extract contains vomitous online technosperm.
Online marketer Lyndon Antcliff recently helped a client achieve over [...]

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Tags: miscellaneous · news

Xenohedgehogphobia down under under

May 29th, 2008 ·

A New Zealander has been convicted of common assault after chucking a hedgehog at a teenager. Luckily for the perp, the crime was downgraded from the more serious charge of assault with a deadly weapon.
Police said he threw the animal at the 15-year-old in the street, hitting him in the hip, leaving a welt and [...]

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Tags: news

Lindsay Lohan is lesbian

May 28th, 2008 ·

What next? She’s one of those lizards from V? Boooooooring.
Lindsay’s been spotted kissing 30-year-old DJ Samantha Ronson (Mark Ronson’s sister) in Cannes. There’s even a rumour they’re engaged.
We’ll stop a while so you can get off the bus and take stupid pictures, and then let’s move on to the next attraction. Follow the [...]

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Tags: celeb gossip

In Bruges / Derren Brown

May 28th, 2008 · 2 Comments

Just got back from a bank holiday weekend in Bruges, which was quite delightful. Not the most bubbly city I’ve ever visited, but as Ralph Fiennes so eloquently put it in the movie, “it’s like a fucking fairy tale”. Stuffed ourselves full of beer, waffles, mussels, pancakes and chocolate, did a fair spot of sightseeing [...]

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Tags: miscellaneous

Ropas calientes para el fin de semana

May 23rd, 2008 · 3 Comments

Translates roughly as “Sexy swimwear for the weekend”. Very roughly. Haha. “Woughly. Stwike him, Centuwion. And fwow him to the gwound”. If you don’t get it, you’re comedically disadvantaged. Watch this movie.
Alright. Back to basics. And by “basics”, I guess I mean…um, I give up. I don’t know what I mean. But here’s some special [...]

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Tags: miscellaneous

13-year-old lives the good life

May 23rd, 2008 · 4 Comments

smg forwarded this to me yesterday and I almost wet myself. Chronic incontinence is a debilitating affliction, let me tell you. But get a load of this awesome story and then ask yourself: if you were inside a thirteen-year-old again and managed to sort yourself out an inexhaustible line of credit, what would you do? [...]

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Tags: miscellaneous

Okkervil River at the Borderline

May 21st, 2008 ·

I missed them in Brighton at the weekend, but got to see Austin folk-indie group Okkervil River last night at the intimate Borderline off Tottenham Court Road. Honestly, one of the best gigs I’ve been to in ages.
Opening act A.A. Bondy got things off to a promising start with his Dylan-esque [...]

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Tags: music

Canadian hard core

May 20th, 2008 ·

Sure, Canada has a reputation as being the most boring state in the US (as Denmark is in Europe, if South Park can be tendered as authority), but that doesn’t mean the land of maple syrup, crimson cops, Celine Dion and poutine doesn’t produce its share of genetic fuck-ups.
A Canadian man who asked his [...]

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Tags: miscellaneous

Violence in Jozi

May 19th, 2008 · 3 Comments

Aaah. The fourth most popular story on the BBC News website this morning. You can’t buy advertising like this!
Twelve people have been killed in South Africa’s city of Johannesburg since Friday in a wave of attacks against immigrants, officials say.
Only twelve? Sheesh! Is Joburg on a go-slow or something?
For those of you in the [...]

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Tags: news

Brighton’s Great Escape Festival

May 18th, 2008 · 2 Comments

Got out of London early on Friday evening and popped down to Brighton where I caught the second day of the Great Escape Festival, hailed as the biggest new music festival in Europe (over 200 bands and artists performing in 20-plus venues over three days). Definitely a good night out, but a little [...]

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Tags: music